Living with a Baby who's ill..
It isn't easy.. Full Stop. When I was pregnant, I imagined everything I would do with my little boy. I imagined playing football with him on Sunday mornings, I pictured his face light up a Christmas and I dreamed of him on his first day of school. I didn't picture going back and forth hospitals miles away from our family home, watch him scream in agony as my eyes both drooped from tiredness and from sadness watching the one person you would die for be in pain. I didn't picture stand there watching him having countless cannulars in his tiny hands or tubes down his throat or watch him be sedated with morphine. I stood there and took it, inside I was screaming at the nurses to make him better, I was shouting at the doctors to find a cure and mostly I was crying with sadness and guilt. Guilt that i still carry today.. Did I do something wrong whilst i was pregnant? Did i not take enough prenatal vitamins? Did my own issues interfere with his...